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The following is an interview between Tower Times reporter Dexter Earley and an anonymous guest.
Dexter: So... Um.. Ellie.
D: Um. SO. Uhh... rats.
D: stop laughing like it’s some sort of joke or something
D:so... would you listen to a podcast about rats
E:depends on what is the podcast about rats is about.
D:it’s just about rats, ellie
E:just rats in general?
Djust rats in general.
E:sure. I’d listen to it.
D: but you have a dog. And rats are not dogs. How can you justify having ... uhh
D: stop laughing
D: how can you justify owning a dog and listening to a podcast about rats?
E:umm I don’t see a problem with that
D:You don’t see a conflict of interest?
E: why would there be a conflict of interest?
D:let’s just... Do you think rats or dogs are better?
E: Oh.. really cutting right to the point. Um.. dogs?
D: I didn’t bring any questions to this interview, so I’ll just have to make them up as I go along
But don’t you think that rats and dogs can co-exist in society?
Also, don’t you think that rats are dogs?
D: almost? Not even if they want to?
E: Not really.
D: Don’t you have anything to say?
E: about rats?
D: I mean, that’s what the article is about. I’m going to put this in an article about rats.
E: I don’t know why you’re interviewing me.
D: I don’t know, just to like work up my interview skills?
E: oh. Rats are good?
D: that’s good. Keep em coming.
E: was that good?
D:yeah. Do you think they’re both equally good?
D: I gotta get an angle on this. Like, “dog owner has new revelation about rats... says they might be dogs”
E: That’s not what I said!
D: I know but that’s the headline. That we’re gonna have.
E: So you’re trying to find a dog owner who thinks rats are dogs?
D: I think you are that dog owner.
E: so you’re trying to convince me.
E: can we just go back in?